


the blood in your veins

by ravenclaw_has_claws



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe, Drabble, M/M, Marauders Era (Harry Potter), Sirius Black Needs a Hug, Vampire Sirius Black, Vampire!Sirius, Werewolf Remus Lupin, wolfstar
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-12
Updated: 2020-05-12
Packaged: 2021-03-02 21:40:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 980
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24143737
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ravenclaw_has_claws/pseuds/ravenclaw_has_claws
Summary: People always told Sirius rushing into things like he always did, would end him in a bad situation one day. This was the day.
Relationships: Sirius Black/Remus Lupin
Comments: 1
Kudos: 45





	the blood in your veins

**Author's Note:**

> I'm reposting some stuff that I posted both here and on tumblr but I ended up deleting my ao3 acc. This one is from march of 2018.
> 
> [ inspired by [this](https://asktheboywholived.tumblr.com/post/171788823817/siri-how-have-your-friends-taken-to-this) by @asktheboywholived on tumblr]
> 
> \- you can follow me on [tumblr](https://ravenclaw-has-claws.tumblr.com/)

People always told Sirius rushing into things like he always did, would end him in a bad situation one day. This was the day.

When he woke up, he first tried to open his eyes, but the light blinded him almost to the point of burning. He yelped and closed his eyes immediately, placing his arm in his face as if it helped to keep the brightness away.

“You are an idiot,” a voice could quickly recognize spoke. He turned his head to James general direction but made sure not to actually look.

He swallowed the abnormal amount of saliva in his mouth — there was something that smelled too deliciously —, and spoke: “You do realize I should be pampered, I’m at the hospital.”

“Not a hospital,” a much higher voice said, and he felt a hand in his arm, Lily was so hot it almost burned him, but he didn’t make a move to get away from her touch. He never did. “Do you remember what happened?” 

At that, he frowned. His memory was never great, Sirius would have to admit, and the constant drinking he had been doing lately to make the feeling of the war just go away, wasn’t helping either. He did remember something, though. It was out of context, just a flash in his memory.

There had been a body, too cold to be alive, and then pain.

He forgot about his hurting eyes and suddenly sat up. He felt stupid once the burning sensation in his eyes started again and closed them instantly. Then, he started to pat his body up and down, trying to see through his hands “I have not lost a limb, right? I’ve seen it in Moody, and it’s not something I want,” he said, joking words in a tight voice.

“You haven’t lost a limb,” was the answer. This time, it was neither James or Lily. It was Remus, with a tight voice that made Sirius feel a lump in his throat.

“What happened?” He asked, his body too rigid to go back to lying on the bed. His question is answered by a silence too heavy to be good, so he retorts to yelling “tell me what fucking happened!”, with his eyes scrunched closed. He was sure he was making a funny image, but nobody was laughing, not even James, who laughed at the dumbest stuff.

“You went to a vampire nest, sure they were working with You-Know-Who,” Lily started saying, carefully. Sirius suddenly felt cold. You just don’t walk out of a vampire nest. “We were able to find you… But they had already…”

Sirius didn’t need the rest of the sentence to know what had happened. “They had already bitten me,” he said, and his voice comes out stronger than he thought.

They hadn’t told the order, they say, but they’d have to, eventually. They were sure Dumbledore would accept Sirius, just like he had accepted Remus, but Sirius wasn’t so sure. Remus lost conscience once a month and could be locked up — he could live without hurting people. Sirius was not like that. He had to kill to live, he couldn’t survive without taking lives.

In the end, they came to an agreement. Sirius wouldn’t hurt innocents, Dumbledore had left that pretty clear, as if he thought Sirius had the cold blood of going around just killing anyone.

Everyone in the Order tried to act as if nothing had happened, they still clapped Sirius in the back when they saw him, and they smiled when talking to him. They were more careful to voice their ideas when those were contrary to Sirius’, as if expecting him to go after them. It irritated him a lot. Everything irritated him a lot. When James was standing too close, and that wonderful smell hit Sirius right in the face — apparently, that was their blood, which Sirius craved now —, and he had to forcefully push James away.

“I’ve told you, Prongs, I don’t want you so near,” Sirius said, after the other boy had tried to put his arm around his shoulders.

“Yeah, because I’m damn irresistible, but I was well before you could smell my deliciousness,” the other boy joked.

He always joked about it, and Sirius had done some dry comments about it too, which reminded him of Remus’ position towards his own curse.

Other days, when Sirius was drawn back to himself, quiet and sad, James said the same he told Remus when they were scared twelve-year-olds, “it doesn’t matter what you are. You’re still our brother mate.”

But Sirius knew better. He could see James’ pain in his eyes, whenever he thought he was hiding, and Lily’s sad smiles whenever the matter is mentioned (the very few times it is mentioned). He had noticed Peter’s hesitation and the step back he took whenever Sirius got frustrated. And all that bothered him to no end, but he understood. Of course he understood. He was a monster, after all, _one of the bloodsucking undead._

He was glad he had Remus, though. He felt closer to him than ever, and Sirius often found himself thinking about the implications of being like that with Remus only after being turned… He usually avoided those thoughts, having enough on his plate.

“Thank you,” Sirius said one night, after a bad night in which he had had to floo to Remus’. 

The other boy had just shrugged, “I’m glad you don’t have to go through this alone.”

“I hate that you had to,” Sirius found himself saying. He had never thought about it, but even as a four-year-old, Remus must have felt horribly alone with so much in his little plate…

All in all, it was not as bad as it could have been. He had his friends, his family. And once they were gone… He’d find someone to make everything right again.


End file.
